Breaking up with someone you have shared a part of your life with is not easy. Letting go of someone you use to be around, someone you shared wonderful moments with and someone you loved so dearly can be very painful. Somehow, if you have been around with the person for so long and you still have reasons to make your relationship work, you can always find ways in winning back your ex and start over.

Here are some ways that may help you in winning back your ex and making your relationship work this time around.

(1) Give time to cool down. If the breakup was bad, or for some reason there were some heated arguments, give time and space to allow both of you to cool down. You can actually determine how much time it would take for your partner to cool down and let her talk about the relationship again. Do not also wait for too long that allows your ex to move on.

(2) Analyze the situation. You may not be able to think straight during those times that the relationship is shaky. But having the time and space on your own, you can try to think what happened to the relationship – what attracted you both to each other and what has gone wrong with the relationship. You can also analyze your mistakes and the things you can do to make it right.

(3) Plan your action. Winning back your ex needs careful planning. At least you have to know what you need to do and identify the right time to do it. One of the most common mistakes we sometimes do is to bombard our partners with so many phone calls, apologies and promises after the breakup that will have an opposite effect on the relationship. The more desperate you are to the other person, the more he or she will shy away from you. Do not beg him to come back to you. Remember that any desperate move can repel the things you want to achieve, and this applies to winning back your ex.

(4) Take care of yourself. Build your confidence more. Be strong. Even if how much you want your ex back, show to the world that you can be happy by yourself and let not other people dictate your happiness. Of course, if you do feel the hurt and pain, you can always cry it out but do not waste too much time dwelling on the hurt. Get out of it. Meet your friends and make yourself more beautiful. The more you will show your ex that you can manage yourself, the more he will admire you for that.

(5) Casually invite him to go out with friends or something you both enjoy but not something that will give him the idea that you will get into some serious talk. If he initiates the talk, the better. You need to be careful with this step though. Choose what to talk about. If you want him back, do not dwell on the past. Forget about the pain and the hurt of that breakup. It would be helpful not to talk about the reasons why you broke up. You both had your time to get over those hurts, now it is time for another chapter. Talk about anything else. Ask him about his new job or you can also talk about wonderful times you both had together. Treat it as if it was your first date and have fun.

Winning back your ex truly needs careful planning, as most often, the hurt and the pain of the breakup will blind you in making good decisions. Giving time and space will truly help you find your composure and strength. It is equally important to remember that if it is not working, you also have to learn to give up.

carolyn anderson dealt with some broken relationships in her life. to learn more about getting your girlfriend back, how to get her back for good. also check out win back love, where you can learn how to win your lost love back into your life.

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