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Top Five Traits of a Good Boyfriend


1. Be honest and have integrity. What that means is while you don’t have to be brutally honest where it hurts someone’s feelings, always try to be straight forward. For instance, if your girlfriend asks if a pair of pants makes her look fat, you don’t respond that yes, they actually are disgusting on her and make you throw up a little in your mouth. What you should say is “I don’t really think those are very flattering” and then offer a positive suggestion, such as adding, “But I really loved how that red skirt you wore last weekend looks on you.”

2. Learn how to compromise. Nobody is perfect. Your girlfriend isn’t and you certainly aren’t either so in order to have a successful relationship, both of you are going to have to make an effort to give a little bit. Learn to compromise on the things that are not crucial in your life. If you are a church going Catholic and it keep you centered and sane, don’t compromise on going to church. If you really don’t care for art museums, but your gal does, give a little for her. Who knows, maybe next time your nonsports going love will buy you tickets to the series playoffs. Just make sure that it is a two-way street. If you keep compromising and she refuses to, then it is time for a serious talk that may lead to parting ways. Don’t stick with anyone who believes it is their way or the highway.

3. Which brings me to my second point. There are some things that couples will simply never ever agree on. For most of these issues, it is perfectly acceptable, in fact, necessary, to agree to disagree. You may be a Republican, she may be a Democrat, but unless politics are important to you (to me they aren’t) then that might be an area where you agree to disagree. If your political views shape you and you are passionate about them, then this may be a sticking point that will determine your future together.

4. Do not lose track of who you are—and she is – as individuals. Tell her you want her to keep her own life and her own friends and that you trust her and love her for who she was when you met her, which includes the life she led before you. She should also grant you this freedom. It can make a world of difference. Often the person we fall in love with changes and makes all their interests yours, which is not the way to go.

5. However, do be open-minded to her world and her interests. Be interested in everything about her and you will be that much better off, personally and in your relationship. Part of that involves being a good listener and being aware of her wants and needs.

Being open-minded will enrich your world in more ways than you can imagine. Being a good boyfriend really means being considerate, but also figuring out what makes relationships last and work.

Bill has been studying How to Get a Girlfriend for the last 5 years in NYC and is a PUA who can help you learn to do the same. The original article can be found here: Top Five Traits of a Good Boyfriend.

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Listed: September 26, 2011 8:03 am