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The Various Keys to a Happy Relationship

If one were to ask five different couples to list the keys to a happy relationship, there would likely be an amazing variety of different answers. Even if a couple shares the same values, how those values are listed can vary depending on perception, gender, experience and many other factors. In the long run, individuals mostly tend to gravitate towards those whose values closely mirror their own.

It is only natural that ideas for maintaining a happy union would be different from one person to another. While some would feel that spending time together is the most important key to a contented relationship, others may believe that spending time apart is just as vital. It is a good idea for each person in a couple to know what their partner considers essential in a happy and successful relationship.

Without this understanding, miscommunications on the importance of these elements will likely lead to disagreements. One aspect that consistently triggers arguments for many is the issue of intimacy. In fact, it is hard not to notice the entire line of books dedicated to this common issue.

When there is a sizeable disagreement over the importance of one value over another, many end up learning one of the biggest keys is actually compromise. Many couples know, consciously or subconsciously, that it is highly unlikely they will agree with each other every single time. It is during this time that couples must learn to compromise and agree to disagree to maintain happiness.

The anxiety filled days of making sure everyone in a relationship agrees on everything are long gone. Just because a couple may have differences over what they consider important, it does not have to mean a battle of wills or the end of a union. Many have come to find identifying what a person considers important is a good way to get an overall picture of who they are.

Research studies have come up with a number of key elements as well. These studies often use a variety of test subjects of every age and in every stage of a relationship. Many times, the conclusions of these studies show that being happy depends on anything from holding hands to daily conversation to instilling a strong foundation of trust.

In truth, all of these things can be essential to maintaining a strong connection. Of the most commonly listed values, trust, good communication, the ability to compromise and intimacy often rise to the top. Even if they are not listed as such, the aspects that people do consider important are often linked to these basic concepts.

Most people get their values of commitment from watching their own parents. Interestingly, it has been shown that elements that were considerably absent in a parent’s relationship can become of great value for an individual in theirs. Likewise, a value that was considered very necessary may not make the list at all.

Those who are not quite sure what keys they consider valuable can work to define what they deem valuable by making a list of what comes to mind and then prioritizing them. Since what a person considers important can change over time, it important to carry out this exercise periodically. Doing so will help keep the union on the up and up and in good standing.

While there are many resources that name five, ten or even fifteen essential keys to a happy relationship, these aspects are actually defined by the individual in the long run. Many times these values are based on a foundation of trust, communication and the ability to give and take.

andy west is a freelance writer for happyrelationships.com, which offers keys to a happy relationship.

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Listed: May 7, 2008 12:08 pm