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The Definition Of Love

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

This is how love is defined in Chapter 13 of the first letter to the Corinthians, verses 4 until 7 in the New International Version of the Bible.

At first look, you’d be seeing the definition of a perfect and ideal love between persons. It is not very easy to attain, and very difficult to practice and maintain. This is because as humans we are imperfect, and tend to become selfish. Selflessness, after all, is what true love is all about.

When you truly love a person, you are willing to wait for him/her to reciprocate your feelings no matter how long it would take. You are willing to endure the hardships and even make sacrifices for him/her without asking for anything in return.

If you are a guy, you do not pressure the girl you are courting to give you an answer. You do not count the days that pass until you get her “yes” if you are truly in love with the person. In that sense, you become selfish because you want her to give an answer in your own time and not hers.

Pride is the bane of all relationships. Pride bars both parties from admitting their mistakes, and paving the way for reconciliation in times of conflict. Pride also deepens the conflict, because no one is willing to make the first move to make amends. If your love is true, you are willing to shed your pride and humble yourself for the sake of maintaining your relationship.

Jealousy and envy are signs of selfishness. There are probably some people who are engaged in a relationship that say their lovers truly love them if they get jealous, because they are afraid of losing them. But in a deeper sense, they are actually just selfish and untrusting because they do not give the other party the benefit of the doubt. When you are in love, you are willing to give your other half 100% of your trust and they will also do the same if their love is true.

A person who is truly in love will not easily succumb to gossips about the one he loves. Instead, a person in love will strive to find out the truth about the gossips before he gets angry or confronts the one he loves. In doing so, he is being just and fair to her as he solicits her side first before he makes a reaction.

The bottom line is: love is not selfish. The person who is truly in love thinks not of himself, but instead his mind is focused on the welfare and the sake of the one he loves in everything that he does.

mikael andersohn is a webmaster maintaining two sites: one is my market, an online advertising site for filipinos to post their merchandise in the hope of attracting a potential buyer. the other is love world, a social networking site aiming to bring people together in love.

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Listed: May 7, 2008 12:09 pm