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Single Parents and the Dating Game
Single parenthood and dating do not seem like words that would be placed in a new sentence. With all the responsibilities laid on a being a single parents, many people automatically assume that dating is not an area of interest for single parents.
Many single parents often wonder how they can go about handling dating. If by any chance someone became a single parent by divorce, the children will obviously need some time to adjust to the idea of their parents starting to see other people. When a parent finds a new romantic interest, life will definitely be more difficult to the children who typically think that both his parents will one day be reconciling. As a result of this it is very important for divorced singly parent to wait for six months to a year before the start contemplating dating. Single divorced parents need to also talk to their children concerning their feelings about their mom or dad getting interested with an adult of the opposite sex. Once a single divorced parent chooses to date someone else, they should ensure that the children know and understand the difference between marriage, engagement etc. The children should know that not all relationship automatically will result in a marriage.
Eventually when a single parent starts to date, they should not feel obligated to introduce the child to each date. Even if the children seem very interested, it is important to only reserve the introductions to someone who the single parent is in a relationship with. This will ensure that the child does not form an attachment with a person who may not be in their life for long.
Before a single parent starts dating, a meeting should be held with the children. Talk candidly with the children as to why the single parent likes a particular individual. The children should be given the opportunity to be part of the preparation. Also this may be a good opportunity for a parent to set a time for the children to meet they person they would like to date. When they eventually meet, do not force your children to be automatically like the single parents friend. It is also nice for the friend not to try an impress the children.
If the single parent notes that the children do not like the friend, they should help the children sort through the emotions. There are many reasons why the children may not like your friend. They may feel threatened. They may also feel that the relationship would make a single parent cater to their friend more than the children. Once they communicate their feelings, the single parent should make sure that they assure them that the friend will not affect the current relationship that they have with the children.
The best thing you can do at this stage is just give you children emotional support. The children should not be rushed to like your friend. Every emotion that your children reveal should addressed very carefully so as to not convey the wrong information about the relationship.
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Listed: March 12, 2012 4:03 pm
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