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Love or Arranged Marriage?


Every one believes that marriages are made in heaven. It might be true but then in reality the couples who marry are either in love with one another or the marriage is finalized or arranged by their family members. Debate whether love marriage or arranged marriage is best is never ending as both sides have their experience and testimony to support the system which suits them.

Nothing is wrong in a love marriage until and unless it is accepted by the couple�s family members. Marriage is not just two people coming together but two families uniting to bring two souls together in holy matrimony. Thus the couple in love will have to face the challenges of the community and pacify their family members to accept the partner chosen by them.

In arranged marriages the family first scrutinizes the possible brides, their family and background and leaves the final decision with the groom or vice versa. The whole family support the matrimony during high and low times. They see to it that the couple is happy with one another at all times. Minor misunderstandings are cleared by advice from seniors who act as relationship managers and marriage councilors. With such an expert team around the couple thrive joyously.

Love marriages are mostly done without the family consents. Very few people attend such marriage. Most of the time bides or grooms family is opposing the marriage for some reasons and may not attend the marriage. In an arranged marriage it is grand ceremony wherein the couple takes the vow before the fire god to stay united. Amidst all the relatives and friends they make a commitment to stay together lifelong. A whole lot of sacrifices, adjustments and changes are what goes into a wedding. Overall it is a group commitment among both the families of the couple to stand united and make the marriage work.

Be it arranged or love the primary goal of a marriage is bringing together a man and a women. They commit themselves to be there for one another life long supporting each other in their overall development. They decide to start a family and bring up excellent kids into the society. Falling in love is a natural instinct no one can avoid. But then many people control themselves and allow their seniors to decide their marriage. They wait until the family finds a match for them. This works for some and does not for others. Arranged marriage has its own social dynamics.

Today parents are accepting reality and becoming broad minded enough to accept the choice of their kids in marriage. Times have changed and so is the attitude of people. It is a very positive change to see matrimonial sites with ads saying that caste or creed no bar. The limiting communal boundaries are being broken and it is proof that people want to find the right match other than the right community or caste. Instead of rating between love and arranged marriages it is good to start appreciating the lovely divine institution of marriage.

rajesh jain writes on behalf of matrimonyhouse.com, india�s fastest growing matrimonial website. matrimonyhouse.com enables users to create and search indian matrimony profile on the website. registering, searching, and contacting prospective groom and bride are absolutely free.

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Listed: November 23, 2009 8:03 am