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How to Win Back My Ex ? – Time to Cool Off


Once I have broken up what is the best way to get my ex back ? I am tempted to flood my ex with messages, emails and other crafty ways of getting to see him/her. I know deep down though that this is NOT the best way to get my ex back.

Sometimes I feel desperate and panic sets in. What does that lead to ? Well, all sorts of desperate actions and really all I do is make the situation ten times worse. If I am hot-headed then I cannot think straight – never mind thinking about a strategy. Nobody can think clearly in that state!

Why I am feeling panicky ? Shouldn’t I be able to get over this ? The answer is that the familiar world (even one with tiffs and rows) was at least reassuring. Now that has gone and I am faced with a lot of question marks about my future and that’s what causes the panic , I guess.

First Step. I need to stand back and stop calling my ex so that I am not going to do anything foolish. This is called the cooling off period and it is very useful for lots of reasons. So,I am going to give it a rest and use my energy more wisely like, say, looking after myself, number one.

Second Step. What do I do if I keep meeting my ex? We may move in the same social circles, clubs and even the workplace. No panic ! There is no need to become like Great Garbo .Why should I become a recluse? So, I just act as normally as possible and am friendly and say ‘Hello’ and then get on with whatever I am doing.

Third Step. I will now decide the date when this cooling off period is going to end. A month should be fine and I can even mark my diary with that date or put a post-it on the fridge door!

Fourth Step: These are the things I must avoid. Resist the temptation to stalk my ex. I will not plan revenge. I will not talk about him/her in a negative way with the few friends I have left. I say few, because there is nothing more boring for my friends than having to listen to the whole sorry saga again !

Fifth Step. Ask myself why I am having these thoughts. If I actually did carry them out they would not put me in a very attractive light . They would only persuade my ex that he/she was right to leave me !

Sixth Step. Now I am going to start thinking seriously and rationally and I will begin to see light at the end of the tunnel – that is I begin to see why things went all wrong. Also now I reckon I should be able to open up communication after the cooling off period.

Now that I am beginning to see more clearly I can start planning my strategy but I must be careful because if I put a foot wrong here, I could lose the game. I can win back my ex. The link below is going to help me follow that strategy and it is a winner !

mark l. robertson writes on dating and relationships. he recommends the magic of making up

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Listed: November 23, 2008 4:08 am