Welcome, visitor! [ Register | Loginrss

How to Use ‘Validation’ and …


It’s possible to talk to a woman for an hour and be completely oblivious to certain signals of sexual attraction she is giving you. This is the reason so many men finish conversations with women only to think, “I thought it went well, but I guess she wasn’t that attracted to me.” In fact, a significant percentage of those conversations would have gone a lot better if the guys were able to notice signals like the ones I’m going to tell you about now: validation and approval.

First let’s define validation and approval. We can lump them together as one concept.

Imagine if you were to meet your favorite movie star. Let’s assume it’s a guy. You spend an hour with him just hanging out. At first it’s tense and makes you nervous, but slowly you feel more relaxed. Of course, he’s pretty laid-back from the outset. As things get looser and more fun, you make him laugh. Picture right now what that would be like—it’d feel good right? Don’t pretend like it wouldn’t. You’d get a buzz when he broke out in genuine, loud laughter. You’d smile yourself and feel alive. That’s how good it feels to be validated by and approved of by someone you see as high value. If you hated the guy, making him laugh wouldn’t give you any pleasure—you wouldn’t give a damn. But if that person has high social value, it makes all the difference.

Okay, now imagine you’re talking to a woman who is very attractive. You want to attract her. You’ve been talking for a little while. Halfway through something you’re saying, you make her laugh and as she laughs she touches you on the arm. In fact, she playfully punches your arm and says, “You are awesome. You’re the most interesting guy in this whole place. I just feel drawn to you.” That would feel pretty good, huh? Yeah. You’ve just been approved of and validated by this attractive woman and you now feel positive emotion—like you’ve achieved something.

Alright, now here’s the main principle of this article. When you are talking to women with the intention, or goal, of attracting them you need to do two things.

1. Avoiding seeking validation and approval from them, at least near the start of your interaction.

2. Watch out for times when the woman seeks validation and approval from you and capitalize on the situation.

So far we’ve used the example of laughing and smiling as forms of validation and approval, but there are many other kinds. For example, if a woman does any of the following, then she is most likely looking to get validation and approval from you, which means she sees you as high value, which means she probably finds you sexually attractive:

• She asks you a question or makes a statement whose main purpose is to ascertain whether or not you think she is up to scratch in some way. For example, “I want to be an actress but I don’t know if I have the right look, what do you think?”

• She asks for permission to do something for which she doesn’t require permission. For example, “Can I ask you a question?”

• She wants you to find her attractive. Usually women won’t be too blatant about this, so you need to look for non-verbal signals. For example, her flicking her hair around a lot or playing with it. That’s a big one.

If you spot two or more examples of the girl seeking validation and approval from you, then you know she sees you as high value, simple as that. That means she either already finds you sexually attractive or WILL find you attractive if you give her the right kind of attention (make her feel positive emotions without coming off as low-value and outcome-dependant).

So, always bear validation and approval in mind when you’re talking to a woman and wondering whether she’s attracted to you and, if not, whether you’re going to be able to attract her at some point down the line.

mr. m. offers a free attract and seduce women crash course that you can download today and you can learn how to seduce women free

Related posts:

  1. How to Get Attractive Women – Free Techniques Inside! Men always dream of having the most attractive women in their lives. But this is not as simple as it may seem. Extreme effort is much needed to have the most beautiful woman. Thus, most men have problems on how to get attractive women. However, there are possible techniques on how to attract women. The […]…
  2. Learn How To Pick Up Women Easily If you are a single, straight guy who struggles to find the girls, have you ever found yourself irritated by those men who always seem to attract women. You know that they are no more attractive then you, they are not richer than you and yet you are always the one who goes home alone. […]…
  3. What Guys Love About Girls: The Deciding Factor You know that there are some women who just seem to be successful with men. They’re the ones who have little to no difficulty in attracting attention from the men that they want attention from. And usually, they have no difficulty in keeping those men attracted to them, too. Well in this article, I’m going […]…
  4. Men – What They Say And Mean “It’s not you, it’s me.” Don’t you just hate those words? Here is a guy who tells you that you’re wonderful and everything, but has to let you go. He’ll tell you that he’s the problem, not you. But truth be told, you’re the problem and he just doesn’t know how to say it. There’s […]…
  5. Perfection Do You Desire It? I’m driving through Brentwood this morning – on one of those days I don’t particularly like. What I don’t particularly like is the heat. I would prefer to live in San Francisco year-round – a few days in the 80s thrown in to lots of days in the 60s and 50s – a mixture of […]…
  6. How To Tell If He Likes You-Top 20 Signs How do you tell if a guy likes you? That is the question that I always hear when a girl is asking to their friends about a guy that she starts getting interested to him. Sometimes, it can be frustrating not knowing the whether he may feel the same way as you do. Sometimes we […]…
  7. Who Makes The First Move? If you’ve been in the dating scene for some time, you’ve probably felt attracted to certain men in places such as bars, cafes, and restaurants. This is normal – after all, these places are typically where well-dressed, well-mannered men hang out. It’s impossible not to be attracted to at least some of the men who […]…
  8. 4 Easy Tips To Picking Up Women There’s goes another one: a beautiful woman you’d love to approach and strike up a conversation with if only you knew what the heck to say. There’s goes another one: another missed opportunity for what could be a beautiful relationship. If picking up women is a mystery to you, don’t be too hard on yourself. […]…
  9. How To Meet Great Women In Bars Today I want to share with everyone a great question I got from someone in London. I’m sure all of you think about these same things when you go out at night too, so let’s talk about this right now! Client: I have two questions for you. You said that when you open someone in […]…
  10. Strip Clubs Rich is an intern that works for me. He grew up in a nice, protected, suburban household in Naples, Florida. Since coming to my office, Rich has been learning the ways of the world. The other night, Rich made the cardinal mistake that most young men have made before: he went to a strip club […]…

254 total views, 1 so far today

  


Listed: October 5, 2008 12:08 pm