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How to Talk to Women

Learning how to talk to women does not have to be rocket science.

Four Simple Rules for How to Talk to Women
Let’s start with the 4 most essential rules on how to talk to women.

1. Complimentary – Who doesn’t love a compliment? Women especially love it when men point out something they find attractive about her, because it acknowledges something she’s no doubt spent a lot of time and energy into. And make it specific, not just “You look nice”. What looks nice? Her hair, her nails, her eyes, her blouse, her necklace, her earrings, her lipstick, her perfume?

2. Interested – Ask her questions – questions about herself and questions about her opinion on things. Show that you’re genuinely interested in her by asking her about the things that matter to her, namely: herself and her opinions on things. And then, when she answers your question, ask follow-up questions directly related to her answer.

3. Attentive – Listen to her when she speaks. Lean in, maintain eye contact, give an occasional and appropriately placed nod or “Uh-huh” or “I see” or “Right”.

4. Upbeat – Nobody likes a downer. Avoid depressing topics. Avoid complaining about your job or your life or anything else for that matter. And definitely avoid discussions of her and your exes. Instead be lively, positive, light-hearted, and upbeat.

And there you have it – the key elements for how to talk to women, in a nutshell.

What to Talk About

Now, to get into some nitty gritty detail: as much as you can, stay on topic (until of course, you feel like you’ve exhausted the subject, in which case move on). The point here is to avoid too many non-sequitirs that make you sound like you’re all over the place. Instead, whenever possible, try and make the next thing you say, whether a question or a statement, directly related to or a natural segue from whatever she was just saying.

Instead of talking so much about yourself or making her feel like she’s on the hot-seat all night with all your endless questions about her, try some of these other topics that are sure to catch her interest and keep the conversation rolling:

*People – people you know, people she knows, famous people, the people in your immediate environment, friends, siblings, roommates, coworkers; avoid talking about exes, though. That might be a conversation starter, but it’s also a date and relationship killer.
*Pop Culture – film, movies, TV, music
*Light News – that means gossip and scandals, not politics
*Work – but if it becomes apparent that she doesn’t like her job, then quickly she gears to something she does like, such as what she’d rather be doing than working at her job
*Hobbies/Interests – hers especially; steer clear of too much sports talk unless it seems she’s into it
*Pets – talking about animals can usually put a smile on any woman’s face
*Fashion – if you know a thing or two about it, great; if not, then you can bring this subject up in the form asking questions to make you more knowledgeable on a subject she knows something about

On the flip side, here are some conversation starters to definitely avoid:
*Past relationships
*The weather
*The time
*Pet peeves/complaints

Also, you should avoid asking “Yes” or “No” questions as they could very easily get one-word answers which create another instant lull that you still have to find a way out of.

Now that you know how to talk to women and what to talk about, you’re good to go. No go out and find some women to talk to, and have some terrific conversations.

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Listed: September 21, 2008 8:08 pm