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How to Stop Your Break Up


Unlike other breakups that seem to be expected or come from nowhere, it can be extremely hard being in a loveless relationship, trying to figure out if you should work on the relationship, or bear the pain of breaking up. Does it seem that whenever there is conflict between you and your partner, that neither of you are able to compromise nor find common ground to work out a happy medium? If you feel like your relationship is coming to an end and the break up seems inevitable, here are a couple of things you can try to salvage it.

#1 Stop playing the blame game.

It is all too common and easy that when relationship problems strike, to blame our partner rather than looking at ourselves for the fault. He is not interested at all anymore in what I have to say. She’s always so distant. Would it be too much to ask, for once, if he could just do something nice for me for a change. If she could just stop complaining I might do more things for her. By blaming your partner, it will only lead to them being on the defense. First you must love your significant other and accept them for who they are; you should avoid focusing on what they lack.

#2 Stop being so clingy.

Depending on your partner to do everything with you is a very serious habit that should not be developed. When you’re too dependent on your partner, it’s very common for a break up to occur. It’s important to know that you and your partner need time apart, and you don’t need them to run around on errands with you. It is not healthy to want to be with your partner all the time, it can be advantageous to both yourself and the relationship to find and enjoy hobbies that you can do on your own, outside of the relationship.

#3 How are you communicating with your partner?

In a healthy relationship, communication needs to be priority. Arguments, snide remarks and sarcastic comments are not effective forms of communication between you and your loved one, as these comments can be hurtful and are extremely disrespectful and demeaning to your significant other and may cause other problems. It is extremely inappropriate to speak to friends or colleagues that way, so why do you find it acceptable to address your loved one in that manner?

4. Stop listening to the negatives.

Are you always assuming that you know what your partner is thinking or doing? If your partner doesn’t cater to your every whim, do you convince yourself that they don’t love you? Stop going with your negative beliefs because they are not reality.

#5 Are you paying attention to your partner?

Are you showing an interest in your partner and what he or she likes? Do they have a fair chance when giving you their side of the argument? A lot of the time, we need to be right and don’t listen to what they’re saying. The next time you disagree, try using a normal tone of voice and listen to your partner’s point of view. No one is right all the time, and by not listening carefully you might be missing something important.

When the above actions fail and do not make any significant changes in the communication aspect of the relationship, it may be time for something more drastic. Time apart is recommended when a relationship has been pushed to its breaking point and both parties involved are suffering. Take this time, clear your head and decide what it is that you really want.

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Listed: October 18, 2008 8:08 pm