Welcome, visitor! [ Register | Loginrss

How to Solve Problems in Your Marriage


Problems are bound to come up in your marriage from time to time and if dealt with incorrectly, they can lead to hurt and eventually divorce. Dealing with problems in a constructive manner is not as hard as it seems but you need to put aside your impulsive feelings of anger and the need to defend yourself and look at the problem objectively.

A good solution to a problem will fulfill 2 criteria:

1. It must meet most of the needs of both parties.
2. It must be good for the relationship.

A solution to a problem must be decided upon by both parties. It is important not to bully your partner into being the only one that compromises.

In order to come up with a good working solution, follow these steps:

Step #1 Pick a specific issue.

You need to focus on solving one problem at a time. Sometimes problems over lap in which case you need to break them down to their simplest form and solve that problem alone.

For example, a problem like ‘I don’t have enough time to myself’ can be broken down into all of the factors that make it difficult to have alone time. ‘I have to pick up the kids from school every day,’ ‘I work two jobs to help keep the family afloat,’ and ‘I have to cook dinner every night’ are potential smaller problems that fall under the first problem.

Deal with each of these individually as part of the bigger issue. Just remember that you have to deal with ALL of the issues that fall under the main issue.

Step #2 Brainstorm.

This is where you get to be creative. Both of you come up with ideas to help alleviate the problem. This is not a time to criticize each other and you have to respect each other’s thoughts and opinions. Don’t take this as an opportunity to attack your partner or undermine their suggestions. Everyone is on equal ground here and both of you have to treat each other as such regardless of what the problem is.

Step #3 Agreement and Compromise.

In this step, you are essentially coming up with a trial solution because you don’t know for sure what will work until you put it in effect. However, you should aim for the best possible solution from the start. Both parties might have to compromise and eventually both of you should agree on the best plan and implement it as soon as possible.

Step #4 Follow up on trial.

It is important to realize that things change and you can’t always predict the outcome of your solution. This is why it is necessary to follow up on the trial solution. Ask your partner how it has been working out for them; is it a good enough solution? Is there anything else that can be done to make the solution better?

You have to ensure that the solution is a working one. Check back and see if it covers the two criteria for a good solution. If your solution creates new problems, you need to revise it and possibly start over completely. Don’t be afraid to try new things, these solutions you come up with are not set in stone but do make an effort to see them through after you have both agreed to them.

If you would like to learn more about communication, problem solving and techniques to improve your marriage and make it the best experience of your life, Click Here.

Related posts:

  1. Can You Define the Root Cause of Your Marriage Problems? OK, so you know you have marriage problems, or believe that you do but can you actually define what the root cause of your marriage problems actually is? You might believe that your marital issues are so great that you can’t reconcile your differences but if you can’t actually identify the true problem how do […]…
  2. What Causes Problems In A Relationship Or Marriage? At the outset of most relationships, sex is one of the major building blocks. It is something that is eagerly anticipated and relished. However, as time goes on, that initial shine may wear off, and partners can take each other for granted. There is also the phenomenon of “coming out” when someone announces that their […]…
  3. Four Potential Problems to Watch For on Free Dating Web … Free dating web sites have lots to offer the average person but make sure to keep your eyes open for these potential problems. Whether you’re using free dating web sites or not, you want to take the sites for a test drive before putting all of your romantic eggs in a single basket. That means […]…
  4. Free Tips to Easily Save a Marriage Sadly, marriages can’t always be perfect. But when your arguments start becoming too frequent, you may need advice on how to save a marriage from going down the drain. One of the most important tools used to save marriage is communication. Without it, a person can end up misunderstanding his or her spouse’s words or […]…
  5. Solving Problems And Bringing Your Family Closer Together How are the relationships in your family? Do you have a strong relationship with them or is it torn apart? There are so many families that can not seem to be in the same room with each other without ending up in a fight. There are several of them that might have not spoken for […]…
  6. Jealousy Problems: Does it Destroy Love? The answer to that question is that yes, literally jealousy can destroy love in a relationship. This applies to both the jealous person and the victim of the jealousy as this destructive emotion has the power to damage and break up a relationship. Insecurity is the root of jealous feelings and these feelings can be […]…
  7. Always Having The Same Argument? Solve The Argument Once And … Fights have different faces but they often involve the same issue, and many times they come up over and over again. Most couples recycle the same basic argument without ever resolving the issue. It’s frustrating and exhausting, but there is a relatively simply way to get to the root of the problem and stop the […]…
  8. How to Manage Your Relationships Problems Couples do argue and fight. To us humans, it’s normal as each of us has our own characters that sometimes can get mixed up and causes troubles. Couples should understand each other to keep the relationship. It’s important especially to new couples to learn how to manage relationship problems that may arise before it happens […]…
  9. Help Me Save My Marriage and Stop My Divorce How can I save my marriage when the odds are against me? More than 2 out of every 3 serious relationships end in a break up. So many in fact that it makes you wonder whether we were meant to be together at all. Despite the statistics most of us want nothing more than to […]…
  10. How to Fix Your Relationship and Save Your Marriage I need help in saving my relationship. You have nothing to be embarrassed about for you are not the only one that is seeking help in that regard. You can be sure that we millions of relationships that need to be saved all around the world. You need to be able to realize what the […]…

74 total views, 1 so far today

  


Listed: December 24, 2011 4:38 pm