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How Is Your Relationship With The In-Laws


When a person gets married they usually only have their eyes on their brand new spouse and that is as it should be. Sometimes there can be some surprises down the road that can make you have to look at others that came along with your spouse and they can be your in-laws. There can be mother in-laws,father in-laws, brother in-laws, sister in-laws, nieces and nephews, and the list can go on. These all are people that you have linked your life with and sometimes it can cause serious interference in a relationship.

It does not matter if you are the new wife or the new husband, issues with family can always come up on wither side. If both you and your spouse are very lucky and lead a charmed life, there will not be any problems to deal with at all. But we all know that this is seldom the case. Even if you get along well with most of the family, there can always be one or two flies in the ointment, so to speak. It might be that you can not stand your father in-law and perhaps he feels the same way about you as the husband of his daughter. Perhaps your wife can not get along with the mother that you love so much. These can be two of the stickiest situations to deal with because most of the time a daughter loves her father and a son will love his mother.

They key to any happy marriage is being able to get along with your spouse and even when you both are able to love and cherish one another, you have to be able to also get along with the families of one another if you are both close to your family. It is sad to say, but sometimes in order to preserve your marriage, you might have to limit ties with other members of your family when they can not get along. This can place as much of a strain on the marriage as the bickering because people that truly love their family do not want to have to sever ties. It could and often does end up causing resentment between spouses.

If you are the spouse stuck in the middle between your mate and your family, you will have to be the one to stop and take an unbiased measure of the situation. You must keep an open mind and be able to make yourself see which party is causing most of the problem. If it is your mate, then you will have to tell them that you think they are making the situation worse than it has to be and maybe they need to learn to be more receptive of your family. If it is a family member that is doing their best to cause problems for your mate, you will have to talk with that person as well, even if it is your mother or father.

Hopefully, it will not have to come down to your making a choice between the two. Before you let it go that far, it could be helpful to you to see a counselor on your own to see if you can get some help figuring out what you need to do to resolve the situation. The counselor you talk to might recommend that you have a few group sessions with your spouse and your family. Sometimes this can resolve difficult situations, but sometimes there just might not be an answer except cut ties with one or the other.

aydan corkern is a writer an you can visit his sites for more information:
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Listed: July 13, 2009 12:02 am