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Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back: The First Step


At this moment, men all over the world are asking, “what can I do to get my ex girlfriend back?” After a break up, many men often try to over-analyze the break up to find out what went wrong. This often becomes counter-productive for many reasons. First, men are statistically more left brain dominant. In a nutshell, this means they are more scientific, relying on logic and concrete details. They also use this mindset to construct apologies, gifts, letters and other strategies to win back their ex. Hoping they’ll convince their ex to come back, their actions often produce the opposite result.

The problem with the typical male approach is that women think differently. Where relationships are concerned, they’re more right brain dominant. They rely on feelings more than concrete data. After a breakup, some women might be unsure about the specific reasons for the break up. Because of this, it’s often a mistake to try to manipulate them with logic and reasoning. Men often mistakenly try to ”sell” themselves to women. When the ex girlfriend doesn’t respond, some will obsess and concoct new, equally ineffective sales pitches to try to win her back.

The best thing a guy can do is to get his ex girlfriend back is to lay back, retreat for a while and gather
some energy and perspective. This is a time to hang out with friends and explore new hobbies. Focus on activities that will make you feel better and raise your self-esteem. However, it’s not the time to jump back into dating which might sabotage your chances for reconciliation. Take a look at your current goals and see what needs updating. Work on yourself realistically. You might want to get back into shape, set your sights on a career promotion or simply relax and take stock in your situation.

Taking several weeks to a few months away from your ex will give you a new outlook on your life and where you want to go next. While you were obsessing, there was no chance to heal and get back to equilibrium. If you haven’t made any changes yet, the time is ripe for improving your quality of life. Also, you’ll gain new insight into yourself, your needs and desires for a relationship. If, after this time, you feel certain about re-establishing a connection with your ex girlfriend, reach out to her in a non-threatening or needy way and find out how she feels. Don’t push it. Be level-headed and respectful.

After this period of distance, if there’s still any spark, she’ll be missing you. Don’t try to manipulate her with a strong display of emotion. This could easily backfire and set you back to day one. Instead, be calm, confident and secure. Show her you’re doing fine on your own. The last thing you want to do is to seem lost and incompetent without her. Be honest, straightforward and keep your cool. Let her know you’re open to reconciling. Remember, don’t be overly available or too aloof. Many have used this strategy to successfully get their ex girlfriend back.

for more information about what to expect and how to survive after a break up, visit: after a break up to learn new tips and strategies for getting back with your ex, visit: get ex back

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Listed: January 12, 2010 8:02 pm