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Getting Rid Of Online Dating Jitters


It is normal to feel nervous about dating online. The opportunity to present yourself as an available single to many people at once can be a bit nerve wracking, especially at first. Besides the nervous feeling, you should take some precautions for your own personal safety, if you decide to meet with someone face to face that you have been dating online.

If you are using an online dating service, use their communication tools to get to know a person before deciding to meet him or her for the first time. This practice will give you time to sort out anybody who gives you any negative vibes. Although, just because someone sounds good on IM does not guarantee that he or she is a prize in real life.

When you are willing to meet someone, it should not mean that the other person automatically gets your name, address and phone number. You should take the time to chat and even talk in person first before you decide whether you will trust the other person with your contact information.

When you make your arrangements to meet, let the other person know that it is just a meeting to get acquainted without any obligations or expectations. Explain that you will feel more comfortable, if the meeting remains more friendly in tone and that it is not a date. You want to keep expectations simple so that no one has any misunderstandings later.

When you have made an arrangement to meet someone online, let others know what you are doing. You will be safer when someone else knows where you are going, your transportation method and when you expect to be back home. You can ease any worries of those at home by calling in to let them know that you are okay as the meeting continues. Carry your cell phone and prior arrangements to let a friend “find” you, if it would make you feel more comfortable.

Do not treat the meeting like a normal date. Unlike a date where one person is expected to pay for the other person, pay for your own way. For the first meeting, if you go to a movie or eat dinner, plan on paying for your own ticket or meal. You do not want to create a situation where anyone feels as though they are owed anything.

If you do agree to meet someone in person, always make your own arrangements to and from the meeting. Do not rely on the other person to take you to and from your meeting. You really do not know the person yet, you are just going for a “trial run” meeting.

Always go to a public place with a new online acquaintance. Women, especially, should not go to any isolated place with someone they have just met online. You really are with a stranger and until, you know the person better, you must watch out for your own safety. If at any time, you get a hunch that things are not okay, leave. You do not owe anyone an explanation for doing so.

Avoid alcoholic beverages when you are meeting someone for the first time. You cannot make the best judgments about a new person when you drink alcohol. You need to be on your guard so leave the alcohol alone for that first meeting or date. If you do have a drink, make sure that you can always see your drink. It is possible to move from dating online to dating in the real world safely if you take precautions. Your dating safety is your responsibility.

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Listed: August 26, 2008 5:53 pm