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Get The Real Thing From Him

Remember your first few conversations with him? You probably talked for hours on end, simply enjoying each other’s company and hearing each other’s voice. Your first few dates were probably up there with the best times of your life, and there seemed to be no way for your relationship to end.

After a while, those times may seem like ages ago when you think about it now. Everything is sweet and fun when the relationship starts out. But as time passes by, he becomes less interested in you. He starts being withdrawn, as though in an entirely different world, most of the time.

Situations like these often make women worry a lot. They ask themselves questions like, “What happened? Did I do something wrong?” or “He’s changed – almost as though he doesn’t want me anymore.” In the desperate search of answers, most women nag their men endlessly to get the answers they want.

It’s natural for women to know what the problem is so that they could get around to fixing it. Strangely, all it seems to do is push the men further and further away. What’s going on?

Men have different ways of looking at a relationship. When only starting out in one, they see things as all “fun and games.” The getting-to-know-you stage is relatively laid back and free of any thoughts of commitment. That’s the reason why men don’t hold back in having fun, taking you out, and being so sweet to you.

But when the relationship starts moving towards a deeper and more emotional level, they think a lot about it. In time they will soon realize that he has to let go of the so-called “freedom” and start thinking about settling down to a lifetime with you.

Men will now have a different picture of the world. He starts thinking about his career, his lifestyle, his hobbies, his strengths and weaknesses – and most importantly, he wonders if you are the “one.”

This is where most women make the mistake of nagging their men and asking why he’s not as fun to be with as before, or where the “feelings” have gone in their relationship. This gives the men the idea that they’re doing something wrong by not feeling it for their women before. As a result, they tend to either shirk from the added responsibility or “make up” for their shortcomings by consciously doing things to make the relationship work – instead of unconsciously moving it forward.

Naturally, nagging would only make him think that “No, she’s not the one.” And you don’t want him thinking that, do you?

Women should be patient and let their man keep his thoughts to himself when he needs to. After the “fun and games” stage, men begin feeling the need to “be a man” to their partner. Because of this he tends to stay away from things he sees as something weak, such as sensuality and intimacy. You can counteract all of his “masculine” energy with your own “feminine” energy. Be supportive and remain affectionate to your partner. He will fall for you even more and make him realize that you are truly are for him.

aaron adams specializes in relationship matters for women. visit http://www.datingquestionsforwomen.com to find out how to get the love back in your relationship.

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Listed: May 7, 2008 12:11 pm