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Get Back Into a Committed Relationship With Your Ex-Spouse …


If you are someone who has ever gone through a rocky divorce, you know the pain, frustration and even sense of disorientation that a person who has experienced this can feel. Divorce is hard for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is that part of you still loves your ex.

But, there is an even more profound reason why going through a divorce is so difficult. It is because when we are married, our life is intimately tied with the life of our spouse in so many ways. Married couples share the same living space, finances, food, and in some cases children and/or pets. When a man or woman loses their spouse to a divorce, it is almost like a piece of them has gone missing.

Recovering from a divorce is hard enough. But, what if you are still in love with your ex-spouse? What if you actually want to get back into a committed relationship with him or her? This is a question that many people dare not ask themselves, but it is one worth exploring if you believe that you and your ex-spouse made a huge mistake by getting a divorce.

If you would like to get back into a committed relationship with your ex-spouse after a rocky divorce, here are 5 tips for getting you going in the right direction:

1. Explore on paper your real feelings about your spouse:
Marriage – and divorce – are extremely complex situations. The feelings and thoughts that we have about our spouse (or ex-spouse) are never simple. Do yourself a favor at this point and spend some time writing about your thoughts and feelings concerning your spouse. How do you really feel? Remember, be honest: you do not need to share this with anyone. This is for your own reference only.

2. Decide what makes the most sense in your life (and that of your kids, if you have any):
Now, take a step back and ask yourself: does it really make sense for you and your ex to get back together? If you have kids together, factor in what you think is best for them, too.

3. Think about whether anything was said or done that makes getting back together impossible:
Did either of you do something that was so terrible that it makes getting back together with your spouse a virtual impossibility? If so, you obviously may want to rethink whether it really makes sense to go down the path of rekindling your love.

4. Engage your ex in a dialogue:
If you still believe that getting back together is the right thing to do, start by engaging your spouse in a dialogue. Do not come on strong by just blurting out what you want to do. Instead, just start talking and see where they are at with everything.

5. If you believe there is still hope for being with them, put together a plan to make it happen:
Now, if you believe you still have hope for getting back into a committed relationship with your spouse, it is time to put together a plan of action to make your dream a reality. Without a plan and strong guidance from experts, it will be hard to successfully go it alone.

Take these 5 tips into account as your get back into a committed relationship with your ex-spouse after a rocky divorce.

Get your relationship with your ex-spouse back on track with expert relationship advice from someone who has saved thousands of marriages at: Rekindle Our Love.

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Listed: January 3, 2012 12:03 am