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Dating Tips – Top 10 Don’ts For a First Date


Most of us know the basic dating rules, like the importance of looking smart, showing an interest in your date and paying them the odd compliment. However, it’s sometimes harder to know if you’re on the wrong tracks when dating – here are the top 10 dating mistakes to steer clear of.

1) Don’t be too formal when greeting your date. A good way to begin a first date is with a big smile and a then kiss on the cheek to show you are confident, open and friendly.

2) Don’t ask your date endless questions about their work. People love talking about themselves when dating but putting them in a work frame of mind may cause stress and anxiety unless they happen to really love their job. Instead, ask your date questions about themselves, particularly what they like to do in their free time.

3) Don’t respond to compliments by putting yourself down. If your date is kind enough to pay you a compliment, accept it graciously and ideally pay them a compliment at some point, too.

4) Don’t interrupt your date mid-sentence – this is easy to do but it shows you are not really listening to what they are saying. On the other hand, it is very good to respond to what they say as they speak, for instance by nodding in agreement or smiling when appropriate.

5) Don’t focus on serious subjects like marriage and children – try to keep the atmosphere light-hearted and convivial. Though it might be tempting to seek out that sort of information straight away, your date has only agreed to a few hours in your company so far – talk of marriage is a little premature! Leave these subjects until later in the dating process.

6) Don’t talk about past relationships. If you paint your ex in a good light, your date may feel they can’t live up to the experience you had with them, or might assume you’re not over them yet. If it sounds like you had some bad problems, on the other hand, your date may start to worry that your relationship with them will also have similar problems – it’s a lose-lose dating situation.

7) Don’t come on too strong by blurting out ‘I love you’ or something similar on a first date. Although it can be flattering, such a sudden declaration will be a turn-off for most people as it comes across as over-the-top for an initial encounter.

8) Don’t come on too strong physically, either. While a gentle touch on the arm or lower back can be a very good thing, much more than that can be too much – it might make your date feel a bit defensive.

9) Don’t drink too much or ply your date with lots of alcohol. A glass or two of wine with a meal is a good way to get the conversation flowing, but too much alcohol can lead to a dating disaster. At this stage it’s a lot better to play it safe drinks-wise.

10) Don’t talk about yourself constantly – while your date will want to find out about you, they don’t need to know everything straight away. Intersperse your own stories with questions about them.

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Listed: September 2, 2009 4:38 am