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Cultivating and Maintaining True Friendships


True friends happen to be one of the greatest joys and blessings in life. Friends there may be; but a true friend is indeed a jewel that has to be cultivated, treasured and maintained to ensure that its luster lasts forever. When you were young you had many friends with whom you laughed joked exchanged secrets and all in all had a lovely time. During this period in life, it was so easy to say I have hundreds of friends and we love each other very much. As you grow older however, values change, ideas differ and circumstances make it impossible to maintain hundreds of friends. Not that you forget them, but everyone drifts away to lives of their own and you find that only a few are left with whom you can really talk and pour your heart out to.

No matter what anyone says, true friendship has to be cultivated and maintained. You just cannot say so and so is my friend for life and just forget about her until you need her again. Never ever take advantage of a friend. Be there for each other, be strong and supportive but never bossy. True friendship is a two way game. You cannot expect to have your friend come running every time you are in trouble or need her desperately, but make excuses when you have to go and see her when she needs your help. Even if you live far away from each other, keep in touch by calling her whenever you can. In these days of high technology, communication is not a problem at all, phoning, e-mailing or even an ‘sms’ to find out how she is could make a big difference to a friend who is feeling sad and blue.

Trust is very important in a relationship and one of the most important ingredients in true friendship is Trust. Trust has to be earned and once it has been established, maintain it. Don’t let out your friend’s secrets to anyone else the same way you would not want your secrets to be known by anyone other than your friend. If anyone should “bad mouth” your friends in your presence it’s up to you as a true friend to defend her as best as possible. Never gossip about her behind her back and try not to be judgmental even if you feel she’s done something you don’t approve of. Remember that she has to live her life the way she wants to. You can be supportive and helpful and tell her no matter what, you are always there for her.

Always remember important events in her life such as her birthday, graduation, Christmas and later on her wedding and the birth of her first born. Be there to share her joy as well as her grief in times of sadness. This is what true friendship is all about. If you can’t be present, make sure you send her a card and a small gift so that she knows you are thinking of her.

True friendship also means listening to your friend when she wants to talk. You might be the only one she feels she can talk to. Listen to her without interrupting and lend your shoulder for her to cry on. Don’t interrupt her with frivolous talk but let her unburden herself completely.

Finally, never, ever take your friend for granted. You may think she’s there for you always and there’s no necessity to call or visit her. Friends are also human and they have to know you’re there for her the same way she’s there for you whenever you need a true friend. If you value true friendship, go that extra mile and be the type of friend who is more worthy than any jewel in the world.

Christine Crotts enjoys the simple pleasures in life, like soaking in a hot tub. Christine has written a site containing reviews on claw foot bath tub, as well as cast iron bath tub.

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Listed: July 7, 2011 4:03 am